Ozcan nearly killed himself, and now he really has. Ozcan virtually came back from the dead, and now he truly has. Let me explain this riddle.

Eleven years ago, Ozcan was in the military. The rigorous efforts of the commanders to make the soldiers feel dumb and inferior had a powerful effect. As is common in the military, Ozcan became terribly depressed and began to think about suicide. Sitting on his bunk one night, he said his last despairing prayer and put the muzzle of his G3 battle rifle tightly under his chin. Breathing one last breath, he squeezed the trigger. Nothing happened. Dripping with sweat, he was stunned and frustrated to still be alive. He ejected the magazine and unloaded the cartridges, rolling them in his hand and pondering the failure.

Two friends entered the room and talked with him for a little while. He told them nothing about what he had just attempted but reloaded the rifle as they talked. As soon as they had gone, Ozcan stood up from his bed, put his rifle butt on the ground, leaned over the muzzle and pulled the trigger. BANG! The bullet pierced his stomach and blasted out of his back. Ozcan fell to the floor. He was seriously injured and bleeding but alive when they took him to the hospital. He was so ashamed, he didn’t even want to look at his visiting family.

Yesterday, I baptized Ozcan in the sea not far from Ephesus. His wife of 10 years watched from the shore with great joy.

Ozcan’s first contact with Adventists came through one of my student missionaries who gave a Bible to Ozcan’s friend. A year and a half ago, Ozcan told me he wanted to become an Adventist. From that time forward, we have studied faithfully together. The closer he has grown to Christ, the more difficult his life has become. Over the last year, he has seen his business collapse as countless people have cheated him. Every member of his family has suffered health problems. But, despite everything, he has kept pursuing Jesus.

I didn’t know the source of his determination until just two weeks ago when he told me of his suicide attempt and showed me the scars. Now I better understand his fixation on being born again—to really die and really rise again! It seems to me that as strong as the evil spirit pushed him to try to kill himself, an even stronger Holy Spirit pushed him through the last 15 months of trial to meet this watery grave head-on. He wanted to die. Now he has done it. He really wanted to be alive. Now he is.

Please pray for Ozcan’s continued growth and for his whole family’s conversion.

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