Real Pain and the Plea for Help

With Southeast Asia’s highest suicide rate, every 10 minutes, another Thai attempts suicide.*

Late one night, I was lying in bed scrolling through my Facebook feed when I saw a post from one of our students saying how unhappy she was about her life. For some reason, I immediately felt a deep concern for her, a 14-year-old girl who has been our student for nearly seven years. I messaged her and shared a link for a non-profit foundation for kids and youth in Thailand that runs a hotline. Shortly after that, my student messaged me back.

“Last week, I had a hard time. I felt heavy in my heart and tired and cried for hours. And it just happened that I took about 40-50 pills. I was shocked and vomiting. I tried to ask for help, but I could not speak. I thought I probably would never see anyone again. It was so painful, and I thought I would die for sure. Then I lost consciousness.”

We continued texting.
“No one in my family knows I attempted suicide. I want to see a mental health doctor, but I don’t want my family to know,” she texted.

“Why are you scared for your family to know you want help?” I asked.

“Because they would not care and would just scold me. When I took the pills, I did not really want to die, but I didn’t know what else to do,” she replied.

“It is good that you want to see a mental health doctor. I could go with you if you want. But I also have to talk with your family first,” I added.

The rest of that night, I hardly slept because of the weight of emotions I felt for my student. I could not stop thinking about how hard it must be for her to carry those negative feelings all alone. At the same time, I was thankful to God that she had reached out to me.

The next day, I got together with our entire AFM team and shared with them what had happened. We talked and prayed together about how best to help our student. I also felt nervous because I knew we needed to have a difficult conversation with our student’s family.

Later that day, I went and talked with our student’s grandma about what had happened with her granddaughter. I told her that I was willing to take her granddaughter to see a mental health doctor. Sadly, her family did not believe that our student had tried to commit suicide. They said that she was just seeking attention, that everything was fine and that she did not need to see a doctor.

I felt so sad for my student. She was asking for help but could not get any support because no one in her family believed her. Later, I had the opportunity to reassure her that I believed her and knew her pain was real. I also reminded her that I care about her and that Jesus cares about her life, too.

I am still unsure how best to help my student, but I believe God has another way to help her that we have not even thought of yet.

- Nilubon Srisai (Teacher Ming) is our creative learning center director and team coordinator for our community outreach and disciple-making initiatives.

*www.channelnewsasia.com/cnainsider/high-suicide-rate-region-thailand-grapples-mental-health-covid-265126

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